Don’t Jump to Conclusions!
April 13, 2015|Posted in: Family and Relationships
Don’t Jump to Conclusions!
Jumping to conclusions can have devastating consequences! Opportunities can be missed, friendships can be lost and hopes and dreams can be crushed!
Every individual has a very personal and unique set of life’s experiences, which develops their expectations in life and influence their reactions to things. Being the egocentric beings we humans are, we tend to operate on the assumption that everyone has the same life experiences, expectations and reactions that we do. Nothing could be farther from the truth! Every single person has a different set than we do!!
Therefore it follows that your reaction to a particular situation or event will be uniquely yours and every other person’s reaction will be uniquely their own. If we keep this in mind it will help us avoid the devastation that is certain to follow when we jump to conclusions.
Here’s a good example of what I’m talking about. My hubby sometimes has mini “explosions!” An inconsiderate driver or cold fries at the drive through make him angry and quite often he’ll grouch loudly about such things. For years my reaction was to get stressed and try to explain to him why he was over reacting. As I got older I learned to just ignore his little outburst and I was amazed that like 30 seconds later he would be cheerful and happy as could be again.
You see, if I were to have a little grouchy explosion like his, I would be extremely upset. There is no way I would be fine 30 seconds later. If I reacted like that, I would stew over whatever set me off for hours. I jumped to the conclusion that my hubby was feeling very upset, like I would be if I reacted like that. He knew he was just blowing off a little steam and then forgetting all about it. He was puzzled by what he thought was my over reaction to his harmless actions.
If your best friend won’t take your calls in the evening, don’t jump to the conclusion that she’s through with the friendship. It very well could be that she’s tired but first thing in the morning she’ll give you a call. If the boss grouches a reminder about meeting today’s deadline, don’t jump to the conclusion that she’s not confident in your abilities. Maybe her grouchiness was a result of a stressful morning at home.
Our life experiences cause our different reactions and set up expectations within us that others will have the same reactions as we do. Instead of jumping to conclusions, consider the situation, think of other possible explanations, ask questions and make sure you have all the information. Being always mindful that we are all different, with unique life experiences that cause us to have very personal reactions to things can save us from embarrassment, heartbreak, disappointment and more!
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Betsy @ Happily Ever After, Etc.
April 21, 2015
Great advice! I always have trouble remembering this… my hubby is the same as yours. He will get mad and be find seconds later. He doesn’t hold a grudge… yet I’m still asking him an hour later if he’s okay. He gets mad at me for “bugging him”!. Oops. Where as if I get upset about something… well as he would say “my day is ruined”. I’ll have to try to remember this one… thanks for the perspective!
LoriGraceH
April 21, 2015
Betsy, it’s good to know I’m not the only one in this situation! It only took me abut 25 years to learn this! :0)